Here are some tips to help you grow as a small group leader:

>> A good small group leader is a facilitator more than anything else. Small groups are powerful because they enable self-discovery, largely through discussion. It’s your job to enable discussion—make that your goal.

>> What differentiates a small group study from a casual conversation is focus. While is it okay for group members to interject off-topic comments, don’t allow the group to veer completely off course. Help the group, rather, to maintain the focus and purpose of the study.

>> If a group member shares something personal that warrants attention, something serious they’ve chosen to share with the group, it is then okay to abandon the study and minister to that group member in an appropriate way. Don’t allow this to happen repeatedly with the same group member (discussion hijacking is not okay), but know that small groups enable powerful community experiences. Expect it to get personal.

>> Because it is likely that someone will share something personal if your small group meets for a significant period of time, it is wise to establish a policy of confidentiality. Anything shared that’s of a personal nature should not be repeated.

>> Avoid the temptation to lecture the group. Because you’re leading, you will naturally have thought considerably about the topic. That’s good. Sharing every thought you have about the subject and denying the group the opportunity to experience the same journey you’ve experienced is bad. Don’t do that.

>> You will likely have at least one group member who attempts to bait you into an argument from time to time. It’s best if you don’t take the bait.

>> Make eye contact.

>> Address every comment made by members of the group with an encouraging gesture or remark.

>> Don’t be afraid of silence. If you ask a question and no one answers right away, give it a few seconds. After half a minute, re-phrase the question to make sure it makes sense. Then wait again. Don’t save the group from the awkwardness of silence. Encourage them to contribute by not answering the questions for them.

>> While you should avoid answering every question yourself, you should not avoid self disclosure all together. Let the group know a little about who you are, even what you struggle with. Just be sure to keep it appropriate.

>> Pray. A lot. Pray for yourself as a leader. Pray for the members of your small group. Pray for your meetings and your discussions. Pray about it all and pray about it often with the understanding that God is truly the One who brings growth to all things. If he isn’t a part of your small group, you’re just having a conversation.